HI5 Nemisis Journal

today..I let Jesus takes the wheel09 21, 07 9:01 AM
I texted him yesterday around 4 pm...asking him if its ok for us to talk...he didn't answer...maybe because he doesn't have a load..or maybe he already given up on me...it hurts, for the first time...i realize that maybe its truely is over...but i wasn't blaming him nor myself...i needed the moment to think...hindi ako nagsisisi sa desisyon ko na humingi ng konting time-out...i needed that time...but kung di niya ako naintindihan..and he gave-up on me, i accept it...Jesus knew what is best for us...dapat nuon pa hinyaan ko na lang sa kamay NYA ang lahat...maybe it would have work out...or maybe maiwasan ko ang masaktan at makasakit...but whatever happen...all i wanted for now is to have peace within...May Jesus help me...
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Sorry...09 18, 07 1:33 PM
I just want to say I am sorry...i don't hate you, I'm just hurting....i know...you didn't mean to make things worse, maybe you just wanted to help...I am sorry...
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AHHHHHHH Life!09 18, 07 9:25 AM
Can I be angry for a moment!!!! Can I? Kailangan ko lang talagang ilabas ang nararamdaman ko!!!! Can you please just shut-up!!!!! and mind your own business! !!!! you don't know anything! You know nothing of what happened! You never know me, how I feel...who I am...!!! You didn't care about me when everythings going ok...you just ignored me...as if I didn't exist...you never once considered my feeling when I am trying to reach out and be close to all of you...and now that everything is falling apart, you have something to say? What kind of people are you? We are grown-ups now...i just wish you could let us be...let us work this thing between us...let us be...please! And you! I wish you didn't discuss this with others...sana ginalang mo na lang yung desisyon ko...I just wish...I hate feeling this way. i don't want to fight and hate anyone, I just want to live a normal life...i want to be content and have a peacefull mind...I don't want to hate anyone...I just wanted to be happy. Is that too much to ask?